It was a normal day I went to work just like any other day not knowing in a few short hours life was going to change. July 10th Thursday morning 12:45 am as I am sleeping I feel a warm rush of water, thinking I peed myself I jump out of bed and wonder could I really have done that and not even known?! I thought I had better control of my bladder than that! Geesh! But as I stand up another rush of water came and like a smack in the face it hit me...my water just broke! Fear rushed over me knowing I was only 32 weeks that it was way too early for this to be happening. I ran downstairs to the bathroom trying to convince myself that I had in fact peed and it was not my water breaking that was causing all of this. But another smack came in the form of another rush of water.
I woke up my husband and said "Honey, I think my water just broke". I wish I had a camera on him cause his reaction was movie worthy! He jumped up rubbing his eyes and said "Are you serious, what do we do?"
Just as in shock as him I call the hospital and ask them if I should come in, they say "yes get here now".
I can say with those words I was almost instantly put into the realization that this was happening and there was no way of controlling what was about to happen.
The whole car ride to the hospital my husband and I did not say a word to each other. I think we were both trying to process what this all meant. Most twins never make it to 40 weeks as we were aware but 32 weeks was way too early and at our ultrasound we had the week before we knew Remington only weighed 3 lbs 13 ounces and Willow was 4 lbs 7 ounces. The thought of such small babies had me worried. Also wondering if everything was fully developed. Their lungs, their brain, their digestive system. The car ride was only 45 minutes which normally it would take an hour and 15 minutes but even with it shortened down due to being so early in the morning, the car ride felt like the longest one I would ever take.
Once we got to the hospital Dr. Cassagnol prepared me by telling me that preterm labor usually yielded babies whose lungs are not fully developed and this could be risky. So first he gave me a steroid shot to try to mature their lungs faster and then he gave me pills to try to stop my labor. The steroid shots needed at least 24 hours to be able to work so he was hoping we could hold off for that long. And not being dilated at all and have a closed cervix gave us hope that we could prolong it for a day.
Getting texts and phone calls out to family at 2 am is a hard thing to do. Wanting to tell them but not wanting to scare them was tough. When the phone rings that early in the morning it's usually never a good thing. We told them what was going on and with each person we talked to I could hear the concern and fear in their voice. It was concern not only for the babies but for David & I. They all knew what we had gone through to get here and they were worried for us. Because no parent wants to sit there and think what if this is it, what if there's nothing we can do and it all goes wrong.
Fast forward to 5 p.m. the contractions were bad, the pain was unbearable. Crying is something I can't even remember the last time I've done but not this day! Cause that crap hurt!!!!! My family and husband sat there with me as I cried and moaned and tried to get myself in a position where everything didn't hurt. HAH no such luck there! One word...EPIDURAL!!!! Best thing invented! Enough said! After the epidural around 8 p.m. I feel like it all happened so fast. I could still feel the contractions but they were minimal. A strong feeling of pressure and discomfort but nothing I lay and cried over. Everyone but my husband had gone home and it was nice that way because David and I got to sit with each other and focus on how life was about to change!
It was now 10:20 p.m and the Operating Room was prepped for me and they were wheeling me in. Most women just give birth in their rooms if they are going naturally but with being preterm twins they wanted me in the Operating Room just in case they had to do emergency surgery. As a first time mother I had no clue how to push, no idea on how this was supposed to play out. But let me tell ya...your body is amazing and talks you through everything. It almost does it on it's own and you assist as it does what it was intended to do and that is give life.
1 hour and 8 minutes after being wheeled into the Operating Room I heard the cries of my little boy, Remington David. There was no question if his lungs were strong cause he was just screaming as loud as he could! I couldn't see much as my glasses were foggy from the oxygen mask I was wearing but I could see his left hand, his tiny fingers all grayish blue. They look like E.T's fingers. Long and skinny. They picked him up to rush him into the NICU and I that's when I seen how small he was and I starting bawling. I've never seen a baby so small...how was he going to be okay?!
It was now after 11:30 and I was thinking ohhh my god! I have to do that all over again! Time to start pushing for Willow. I was pushing so hard I thought my eyeballs were going to pop out. I was trying to have her born before midnight so her and her brother would share the same birthday. It wasn't until 11:58 that I let myself be okay with knowing that was not going to happen. Little Miss Diva decided she wanted her own birthday!
At 12:25 a.m I felt life come alive for the second time. Willow Grace was here and was screaming as hard as she could and I felt a weight lift off of me with the sound of her sweet voice.
Both were born, both were breathing and both were already so loved.
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